Letter To My Friends

Its amazing when strangers become friends,
But its sad when friends become strangers.
I never want to lose you as a friend!
Send this to all your friends.
Including me, if you consider me one.
I met you as a stranger. Now I have you as a friend.
I hope we meet in our next walk of life where friendship never ends.
I may not be the most important person in your Life!
I just hope that when you hear my name you smile and say THAT’S MY friend!

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Words of Encouragement To Sister who suffers from depression

Dear sister,May Allah make this easy upon you and  your family! Allahummah Ameen!!! I will offer dua for you and I clearly understand the feeling of depression,darkness and sadness it’s not easy at all. The struggle gets real trying to hide it from your family and children,just remember that Allah will never place anything upon you that you can’t bare. And sadness is not from Allah so hold on tight to his rope . Allah tests Us this is all part of his plan just offer prayer  and remain patience , reach out to friends for support and know you are loved and not alone everyone has struggles of some sort, try and have a good day sister, love your sister in Islam1622001_810512085630770_1327555773_n

Mothers ARE THE ONES

WE ARE THE ONES
We are the strong women who hold everything down
From the kids, dinner and tend to the strong men when they are around
We are the beauty that keep the world spinning by the Mercy of our Lord
By carrying the next generations from 9 months to 18 plus year our time is never bored
We keep our man strong, loyal, and we are a supporter by his side
We keep him going strong and balance out his pride
We are the ones who stay strong
Even when everything around us goes wrong
So my SISTERS OF ISLAM stay that beautiful woman Allah made you to be
Be confident, humbled, and let your pious self out for the unbelievers to see
That you are beautiful through your eyes and soul
And Insha Allah we will be the ones Allah let us enter the gates that Paradise holds
— feeling blessed.

Ramadan day 7

I fasted today and went to the masjed for isha prayer and the extra prayers they do after isha prayer.

The women were actually quite while the prayer was being said ( in usa they keep on yap yapping while the Imam is doing the prayers) It was a nice change to be able to hear not that I actually understood much .

It saddens me that I can barely speak and understand Arabic I do try and try feels like I am beating my head against a wall .

My gum has become infected been rinsing with salt water.

Ramadan day 6

I fasted today and did all my prayers I felt like crap so when I wasn’t praying I was laying in bed trying to sleep it off.

I feel feverish but don’t have a fever another thing is every little noise bugs me it sounds like fingernails on a calk board .

I don’t feel like I fit in here, I am the odd ball out , no one really understands me or how I feel .

Insha-Allah tomorrow will be better.

Ramadan day 4

I didn’t do well today I was in so much discomfort due to my broken tooth and my baby boy he’s fussy and teething spent all day keeping him calm and also dealing with princess and monkey ( my other two young children ).

I did do all my prayers and a few extra prayers after iftar went to the dentist and had a top left side tooth near the front yanked out it broke and even though I was numbed up it feels like someone stomped on the whole left side of my face . Once back at the house I feed baby boy took pain medications and am just waiting for the pain medications to kick in ,Insha-Allah I feel better tomorrow.

Ramadan Almost here , While in Morocco

as salam alikum

I haven’t written in a while been quite busy with life , life has been quite trying to be honest I have been struggling, I am trying to live and be happy in a foreign country , I have been here since January and it is still hard I barely speak the language to be honest my 4 1/2 year old and 3 1/2 year old speak and understand more Arabic than I do.

My struggles seem to get the best of me some days I suffer from bipolar depression which means my brain chemicals are all weird and off my brain seems to be for a lack of a better word broken , I feel sad and blah when I have no reason to , medications don’t seem to help some days are better than others but lately it seems the blah’s have taken over my life I struggle to feel anything but sad.

I have been dealing with teeth pain , have been to the dentist three times in three weeks and still the pain is here have tried to explain to my sister in law that the teeth need to be root canals or to be pulled , the dentist just seems happy to clean out teeth and repack with stuff then see me in a week to repeat , (this is when I miss American dentists at least in America I can talk to and make myself understood , I would have had my teeth fixed the 1st time in America if I was home ) Morocco is a bit backwards and way laid back everything is tomorrow , tomorrow and sometimes it just makes me want to scream .

I have been struggling with my Salat since the 9th of this month I have started keeping track of how many times I pray , Islam requires 5 times a day on the 9th, 10th 11th I made all 5 prayers from the 12th through the 20th I had my monthly period and when it is cycle time women do not make salat after my cycle I started keeping track again 21st through 27th I made all 5 prayers some days it seems easier than others .

 

Ramadan is almost here and to be honest I am nervous and anxious I want to succeed at fasting but I do not want to affect my milk supply so I will try not really sure how well or what to expect as I haven’t really ever fasted more than a few days here and there since I became muslim mainly due to my health , the last few  Ramadans I was either   pregnant , breastfeeding or pregnant and breastfeeding or just pregnant yes I have had three babies in a short time span 2009 baby 2010 pregnant 2011 baby 2013 baby 2014 breastfeeding said baby who will be 1 in middle of Ramadan .

I wonder how Ramadan will be celebrated in a muslim country , yes Morocco is a muslim country this should be exciting I am looking forward to it and am a bit nervous as well .