Dealing With Mood Changes …..

As Salam Alikum Readers

I haven’t been writing as much as I would like , I have been struggling with a few things . Feeling connected to my children is one of them , let me explain here a bit in depth, myself and my husband decided it would be best for their education if they went to school in Morocco and before February of this year I was with the children then I had to return to the USA and I’m missing my children, I chat with them through WhatsApp and get tons of pictures but it’s not the same as holding and hugging them chasing them around the house , I miss the mundane chores and activities I did with the children I miss them jumping on me in the morning and running to show me their latest drawings as well as their latest boo boo even if said boo boo doesn’t actually exist.

Another thing I’ve been struggling with is my health still trying to figure out why I get stomach aches because of this I have decided to remove cows milk out of my diet which is a lot harder than it sounds. I ran out of milk a few days ago and asked my husband not to buy anymore milk , he doesn’t really drink milk but he loves buttermilk but milk and buttermilk are completely different and I don’t care for the taste of buttermilk , I do like goats milk and it doesn’t upset my stomach so I just switched types of milk. I’m also trying to give up added sugar so today was the last day of the sugar I don’t plan on buying more don’t really have a need for sugar in my house my husband is diabetic and shouldn’t eat sugar so no more sugar for us. Also trying to decrease the amount of breads we eat there are healthier options aside from bread and breads turn into simple sugars when broken down by the body.

Will post a update on the progress in about a month, in sha Allah.

My Last Goodbye 

My Last Goodbye

The time has come for my “last goodbye”, 

On this earth, 

Thought I would let you know, 

For all its worth 

This “last goodbye”, 

Today, 

Doesn’t mean, 

I want see you again, 

Someday.

I know you’re not in that body, 

I see. 

But it’s all that’s left on this earth, 

For me. 

With God, 

And my children, 

By my side,

 I’m trying to say, 

“My last goodbye.”

 All I ask,

 Is strength from Allah , 

To see me through, 

To say, 

“My last goodbye”, 

To you. 

My heart may be broken, 

But with Allah by your side, 

The hunger, 

Suffering and pain, 

Will no longer be inside. 

So, 

Sweet peace to you, 

As you take that final ride.

“My last goodbye”, 

To you, 

My precious babies

Today, 

Allah , 

Has you now, 

Forever, in his bosom 

( This poem is for all my babies that I lost due to miscarriages)

Letter From Mother To Daughter

“My dear girl, the day you see I’m
getting old,

 I ask you to please be
patient, but most of all, try to
understand what I’m going
through. 

If when we talk, I repeat
the same thing a thousand times,
don’t interrupt to say: 

“You said
the same thing a minute ago”…
Just listen, please. 

Try to remember the times when you
were little and I would read the
same story night after night until
you would fall asleep. 

When I don’t want to take a bath, don’t
be mad and don’t embarrass me.
Remember when I had to run
after you making excuses and
trying to get you to take a shower
when you were just a girl?

 When you see how ignorant I am when
it comes to new technology, give
me the time to learn and don’t
look at me that way… 

Remember,  honey, I patiently taught you how
to do many things like eating
appropriately, getting dressed,
combing your hair and dealing
with life’s issues every day… 

The day you see I’m getting old, I ask
you to please be patient, but
most of all, try to understand
what I’m going through. 

If I occasionally lose track of what
we’re talking about, give me the
time to remember, and if I can’t,
don’t be nervous, impatient or
arrogant. 

Just know in your heart
that the most important thing for
me is to be with you.

 And when my old, tired legs don’t let me
move as quickly as before, give
me your hand the same way that

I offered mine to you when you
first walked. When those days
come, don’t feel sad..

Just be with me, and understand me
while I get to the end of my life
with love. 

I’ll cherish and thank you  for the gift of time and joy
we shared. With a big smile and
the huge love 

I’ve always had for
you, I just want to say, I love you,
my darling daughter.”
Love mom

Boys

As Salam Alikum

My fourth child turned 5 wow where does the time go? It seems to just fly right on by!

Some things I have learned about raising boys , I have 3 boys and two girls . Boys are way rough and tumble when they play ,I’m not saying that girls aren’t rough and tumble because they are as well, what I’m saying is so far to me boys are rough and tumble 24/7.

Boys are very rough on their clothing always seems to be ripping and tearing it , as well as getting it dirty beyond dirty when I wash their clothes I have to wash at least twice to remove all the dirt yep that’s a boy for you. White on small boys will not stay white for long it will become grey or brown depending on where they are playing . Easy tip: stick with darker colors easier to wash and stains don’t as much or show up , don’t bother buying white socks it will just eat up your time scrubbing the dirt out of them.

Don’t worry about every time the fall and bump their head , boys bump their head all the time they are like little monkeys jumping and climbing everything , yes I do mean ever things stairs, stair railings , walls , anything , trees poles you name it they will try to climb it . Another thing is they love to jump off of stuff beds , chairs , coffee tables the list goes on and on.

Boys have their sweet and cuddle side , my boys have a rough and tumble lets climb up and jump on mommy to hug her climb up her back yes they are always active and have given up napping for the most part.

 

Prayer to Allah

islamic-quotes-on-trials-2

Allah is the best of planners and providers.

Allah gives trials and tests to those he chooses.

Allah has tried far better people with far worse trials and they stood firm steadfast and far more patient then I.

 Allah sends mercy and ease in due time to those who remain patient. All that being said I have to tell myself this sometimes on a daily basis. I have had such a difficult time and have such a heavy heart right now.

SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder) is so bitter sweet it has its ups and downs and moments of truth.

I pray that Allah helps and heals my daughter and son.

I pray that Allah protects them and keeps safe and upon the straight path. I pray that Allah blesses my children and keep them strong steadfast and patient.

I pray I can make it through my test. I pray I can handle it all with steadfastness and patience.. Ya Allah

patince

wipes for house

Ingredients

½ cup water
½ cup vinegar
8 drops essential oil including lavender
1 teaspoon detergent
Micro-fibre cloths
Large airtight jar
Instructions

Place cloths into large jar
In a jug combine water, vinegar, essential oil and detergent, mix to combine
Pour liquid over cloths
Seal jar

Use to clean things when done with wipe rinse it and place in laundry to be washed . 

Saves money and doesn’t have all the weird chemicals as store bought wipes

Quick Floureless Peanut Butter Cookies

1 cup peanut butter
3/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup nutritional yeast
2 eggs
1/2 cup peanuts roughly chopped
1/2 white chips or chocolate chips can also use both
Cream together peanut butter sugar nutritional yeast and eggs add nuts and chips.
Drop from rounded tablespoon or teaspoon depending on what size cookies you want, can make mega cookies as well. Bake on cookie sheet lined with wax paper.
Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 6 to 8 minutes.
Remove from oven cool on wire rack enjoy warm or cold with tea or coffee.

Makes about 2 dozen cookies unless you snack on the dough like I do before it’s baked

* can add cocoa powder 1/2 cup to make chocolate peanut butter cookies just add 1 more egg.

pbwcpbwzaatar and coffee